Much of life is determined by chance, much by choice. By chance, I forgot to check into my flight to Seattle last weekend. So, I was in the last group of passengers allowed to board the plane, which severely limited my choice of seats. If you’ve ever flown on Southwest Airlines, you know that when you check-in online 24 hours before your flight, you are given a number—1 through 60 in the A, B, or C group. That number and […]
The folly of youth is like Funfetti cake: sweet and fun-seeming, with pastel pink and blue and green chunks of whatsits, only serving to break your teeth and hasten the onset of childhood diabetes. It’s the same folly that, coupled with three Bud Lights, will make you think you can jump a CTA turnstile with no repercussions. My second year in Chicago, my roommate, Amber, our friend, Dan, and I went to see Fosse at the Oriental Theatre. We were […]
I’m having this problem. It’s kind of embarrassing. Like I’ve been withdrawing from people and doubting my life choices. I don’t know what you do when you have a problem like this. Some people consult a religious text or a self-help book. Maybe some poetry, if it’s that kind of problem. But right now, I need something practical — hypothesized, tested, retested. I need something that can accurately predict the future to within three significant digits. What I need, clearly, […]
In the summer of 2007, I was just finishing my first year of grad school, which means I was a fucking idiot—especially when it came to matters of adulthood. My roommate and I didn’t pack anything until the day we had to be out of our apartment. That morning, his parents came and helped him, took his bed in their pick-up truck and packed his clothes in boxes the way regular humans pack clothes. I shoved all of mine in […]
